She

Now she’s alone again, wondering if the sun could lighten up the dark corners as she stands comfortably there. Wondering if the wind can blow away the agony that lies beneath the memories that stab her from time to time. Wondering what and where the wilderness of life will take her this time.

She is as weak as the vulnerable plants that surround her but she comes into the light as a strong being. She tries much not to be tamed even the weakness is obvious in her body language.

She will heal on her own time, on her own light.

Receive Me and Help Me Unlove

How can one heal when one still loves?
I love but it’s no longer enough,
Not enough to make you and me happy.
In fact, love makes it harder.
I miss you, and it crawls in the back of my mind,
I hate it every time I miss you, I don’t want to be alone but I can’t take the distance anymore.
I don’t want to love from afar anymore.


I don’t want to miss you cause it’s killing me each day,
I want to forget and wish someday when I see your face, my heart won’t sting anymore.
I want to push you, have your memories piled at the deepest part of my mind,
Where I can’t easily remember you
But it is so difficult since my heart surely remembers you, the details about you.
It remembers even if I don’t think of you,
It aches alone even if I don’t see you.
God, take me out of this misery, let me heal, cause it breaks me as a human,
Take me out from this hellish state,
Let me unlove, let me not to care.
Let me let go of this human being that I can’t even perceive.
I cannot handle it anymore, and crying doesn’t even help.
How can loving someone have a cruel impact on me?
It’s so cruel that it shuts down my world.
I don’t want to love anymore, oh please God!
Begging for you to take away my love.
If I can’t be happy then I’d rather feel nothing at all,
I’d rather have that than feel this pain that keeps crawling back.

Yet people don’t even know the depths of your misery. When you’re ignoring depression, you’re bottling the feelings in. When you’re fighting depression, you just get exhausted. So what are you gonna do?

Once you have it, it only waits outside of your door, waiting… knocking… until you give in. It doesn’t go away. And people think it can be cured, well it can be held long and just burst out, but after, it’s still there, waiting for time to get out. And after, you just have this cycle.

Depression is not an excuse, people might wonder why a person cries even after having a good time,

They might wonder why a person breaks down after grinding through life.

Out of nowhere, out of time, a person can break down— all confused and angry.

Angry to feel overwhelmed with too many things that for you are also confusing, and that people may only see it as “simple”.

I even think how would they feel if they were in the situation. Those that are near to me, can they take it? Can they survive?

Difficult.

Yet tend to survive every day. Live life until depression takes it away. To make life count while depression is still waiting to take its turn to overcome your physical, mental, and emotional aspects.

We may be happy now but sooner or later we cry.

People need people, and we only need persons who would be willing to endure us as long as we also try hard to make it easy for them even so depression exists. Acknowledging it and not neglecting it. Adjustments needed in both parties. Not just for our sakes. Depression is not an excuse, so one must work on it by at least letting the loved ones know hows it feel inside. If they acknowledge it, then good! Now build strength from it!

Read this if you are still in love with the person that you are trying to get over now, and if that person has already found someone new.



A Desperate call

By: Brae
It's a little sad to sing a love song in my head,
When there’s a person in my mind who’s stranded.
To sing alone softly while having a reverie.
When all I think that matters is you and me
A little depressing to walk on streets under a pale blue sky
With a heart carrying a heavy rain, waiting to burst and cry.
To turn my head up and hope for the best,
When I know my world turned out to be so soulless.
It bothers me a lot not getting used to the changes.
To live without you and to live with such bitterness.
For crying out loud! I still love you somehow,
Even if things are different right now.
Even if I did give the best effort to give you everything,
And showed you the only best I could bring,
Maybe it was never and will never be enough for you.
No matter how hard I try and no matter what I do.
Life’s so dull not having you around,
‘Cause in your arms, I know I’m safe and sound
But since you’re gone and left me without a trace.
I just hope, a revival will take place.
It’s martyrdom to feel this way,
To still love you even if I feel astray
And still long for you despite the pain.
Even if this circumstance drives me insane.
I can only write down what I feel
And this distressful feeling is hard to reveal
And I know you wouldn’t even care to listen
If I try to speak and hold you then.
I’m still not ready to live my days without you,
I’m still so into you even if we’re through.
You vanished like a faded silver star,
Wish I could pull you back, but you’ve gone too far.
Everything got worse as it went along
Now it hurts more and adoring you feels so wrong.
I’m living solo while you’re breathing on your own,
You found a replacement while I’m still so alone.
I can’t measure how much it hurts to live with this misery,
Feels like it’s all my fault and that I should be sorry
That I should be the one to take all the blame
Being left out for shallow reasons, it’s a total shame.
Tiring it is to hold on to someone who has other options.
To cry all the tears that can’t even reach my satisfaction.
To wake up with weary eyes and a heavy heart
Can’t believe in just a snap we broke apart.
I’ve taken my time and learned to take you for granted,
Just slowly taking my life back without a tear getting wasted
Maybe I’m almost there of getting over you
And being happy on my own is what I should pursue.
I’m halfway to ending this desperate call
For the things that hurt, I don’t want to recall.
Unspoken it is but I’ve written it all
So goodbye for good and I swear, no more tears to fall.

Pardon my absence for the couple of weeks. I hope I still have you looking forward for any updates.

For all the poem lovers who happen to be undergoing a heartbreak right now, or that if you know someone who is, I’ve got this poem for you with 13 stanzas “A Desperate Call”. This goes out to people who are currently in a break-up, also fits for those who are going through divorces. Overall, anyone who’s going through separations from their beloved.

I hope you don’t feel alone, or at least you can say you’re not the only one who’s feeling this heartbreak. Anyone can say that everyone goes through break-ups and you will get over soon but when you’re in the moment, you can’t deny the fact that you feel helpless. WE KNOW it will be over soon but let your heart bleed out, respect its time to heal. Accept that you’re in pain cause that will be the kindest thing you can do to your heart.

You could be having the feeling that it’s the end of the world, it’s okay! But pick yourself up. It’s just now that you feel that way and it’s just the emotions taking a toll on you.

Give it a time, give yourself a time.

Never forget that there’s always an opportunity lining up every time a door closes. So it’s not the end of the world, it’s only the end of one of the chapters in your life. Cliché but true. Believe that you will soon recover like every wound when you get a cut.

You ever had that feeling on your youthful days where you always felt confused about the signals that a certain person was giving you? Mixed signals that you couldn’t seem to figure out or it could be, it was already obvious but you just didn’t want to accept it. When you just allowed yourself to be fooled over and over just so you didn’t wanna lose sight of him/her.

It’s tragic that there’s always a chance to be fooled, although it won’t happen if you don’t let it, it’s just that the love for the person weakens your resistance making you give in.

It is easy to say “leave if you’re not treated right”, it’s the wisest thing to do, but finding the broken line of a cycle for you to get out is always a challenge. You might have already noticed the broken line to exit but it all ends up with you, whether to decide to leave even if it’s obviously there or decide to stay even if it’s already tearing you into pieces.

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Adding more body to braewrites.blog, “Youknowitwrite” is another category that you can find in the Menu Bar on the right corner beside the “Heartbreak Poetry and Random Quotes”, below “Poetry Blog”. “Youknowitwrite” contains images that are mostly fetched from Pexels and I just added texts or “quotes” into them.

https://www.pexels.com/search/free/

More updates coming! Thank you for the support. As of now, I still have a little crowd but I still will push through. #dontgiveupyourdreams especially when it doesn’t harm you or anybody! ❤️

If you feel a little bit sad from a heartbreak but can’t seem to let it out, visit my blog to read some of my poems and maybe you might find something there that you can relate to. Ponder from them and hopefully you will feel better or at least feel that you are not alone.

  • Introduction
    Throughout the years, I have been collecting my poems from different situations and most of them are coming from a heartbreak— broken friendships, grief/loss, broken promises, self-reflections and of course,…
  • About
    About me I am a writer, particularly a poet who has been writing poems behind closed doors for more than a decade now. I am 28 years of age, and…
  • Move on
    {1} The ever first poem that I’m releasing, ‘Move on’, is about getting over unrequited love. I have composed this years ago but this is still one of my favorites…
  • Love as a Drug
    [2] Love as a drug (Love is the Medicine for Broken Hearts) The idea here is comparing love to a drug, too much of it is not good for us.…
  • Love is the Medicine for Broken Hearts
    Anyway, here is the second poem. Like, share and Comment what you think. 🧐🤔 Love is the Medicine for Broken Hearts —Brae Love is the medicine to ease the painThat…
  • Intro: Beside the River
    {3} Beside the River I find this poem a little bit lousy and cheesy but I still want to share it with you my dear readers. It is actually how…
  • Beside the River
    So here goes the third poem… Beside the River —Brae I can still rememberWhen we were beside the river,It happened quite a long time ago,Yet it feels like it was…
  • How you Mean to Me
    {4} How you Mean to Me This poem was actually inspired from a song, “Only One” by Yellowcard. I got so into deep while listening to the song that I…
  • More of How you Mean to Me…
    History: I was battling with myself because I wanted to get out of the situation that I knew was my own doing. I couldn’t accept his goneness. It was not…
  • Coding
    https://wordpress.com/post/braewrites.blog/ https://braewrites.blog/2021/12/04/

https://wordpress.com/post/braewrites.blog/

https://braewrites.blog/2021/12/04/

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More of How you Mean to Me…

History:

I was battling with myself because I wanted to get out of the situation that I knew was my own doing. I couldn’t accept his goneness. It was not his fault that I couldn’t get over him, I kept rejecting the fact that I couldn’t forget him and enforcing myself to get over right away. It felt unhealthy for my emotional and mental state. I guess, that happens when you do fall in love.

You will keep running in circles if you deny your pain. You can hide it but eventually, it will burst out waiting for you to deal with it. To accept is to acknowledge your pain. You can’t start the process of acceptance if you keep denying how you feel or hide it under your skin. All along in the circle, you will just end up frustrated.


Let’s be patient in terms of acceptance, it’s the gateway to release ourselves from circling around a pattern. —Brae


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How you Mean to Me

{4} How you Mean to Me

This poem was actually inspired from a song, “Only One” by Yellowcard. I got so into deep while listening to the song that I had to make a poem out of it. I know a lot of the readers who are my age will also feel nostalgic if they play the song because this was famous back then.

Only One- Yellowcard

My aim here was to give a comparison between him and matter. I elaborated how I felt during those sad times but at the same time, I wished I never had them. I used to be proud of this piece but I still gave it a little trim today to bring more effect to it. I hope you will like it too.

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Beside the River

So here goes the third poem…


Beside the River

—Brae
I can still remember
When we were beside the river,
It happened quite a long time ago,
Yet it feels like it was yesterday, still fresh in my mind.
It rained that day
But still, I wore a smile on my face
Because I knew I was going to be with you,
Was full of excitement just to meet up with you.
The first move you made,
you set your hand around my waist.
I knew you wanted to get closer to me
And so was I, you belonged to me.
At that time, you laid your head on my lap
I couldn’t believe I had you in my grasp.
There were so many fond moments that happened,
Was even so thrilled to even hold your hand.
I could never forget your smile
And we were lost in each other’s eyes.
I just couldn’t forget when you tickled me,
You just didn’t often do that to me.
You amused me, felting all was so right
But suddenly, it turned into a fight.


We fought over a little thing
That I made it big
And I thought it would be fine
After I wept and apologized.
I never thought it would be my last touch,
My last moment, my last hug.
We were enjoying our presence but was gone in just a few seconds,
Now, forgetting you I can’t even do, not in a few weeks, worse, not in a few months.
Beside the river,
I had you and you had me as your lover.
Beside the river,
You left me there, and now I wish I don’t remember.
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