So here goes the third poem…

Beside the River

I can still remember
When we were beside the river,
It happened quite a long time ago,
Yet it feels like it was yesterday, still fresh in my mind.
It rained that day
But still, I wore a smile on my face
Because I knew I was going to be with you,
Was full of excitement just to meet up with you.
The first move you made,
you set your hand around my waist.
I knew you wanted to get closer to me
And so was I, you belonged to me.
At that time, you laid your head on my lap
I couldn’t believe I had you in my grasp.
There were so many fond moments that happened,
Was even so thrilled to even hold your hand.
I could never forget your smile
And we were lost in each other’s eyes.
I just couldn’t forget when you tickled me,
You just didn’t often do that to me.
You amused me, felting all was so right
But suddenly, it turned into a fight.

We fought over a little thing
That I made it big
And I thought it would be fine
After I wept and apologized.
I never thought it would be my last touch,
My last moment, my last hug.
We were enjoying our presence but was gone in just a few seconds,
Now, forgetting you I can’t even do, not in a few weeks, worse, not in a few months.
Beside the river,
I had you and you had me as your lover.
Beside the river,
You left me there, and now I wish I don’t remember.


This moment was actually the final break-up with him, there was no proper closure which I think was the reason why I stayed, I was expecting that he would eventually come back to me. Within the two years, I think I was in denial that I was secretly waiting for his return. I wanted to wait but I didn’t want him to know, I also wanted to show him that I didn’t want him anymore.

Most of the time, expectations just drives us to become foolish. It’s s like daydreaming but on the evening.” —Brae

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